How do you get anywhere if you don’t strive?

I got this question from a potential client yesterday.

In my experience, those who transform the fastest do so when they approach changing the process mindfully.

When we approach it mindfully and intentionally we end up somewhere we actually want to be, rather than where we think we should be.

Mindfully means without judgment, without striving, and without pushing or throttling.

Mindful transformation and change are:

patient,

kind,

compassionate,

accepting,

intentional,

deliberate,

and loving.

They incorporate gratitude and generosity.

When you approach personal growth from a place of gentleness and kindness to self, the process is more expeditious than when you think you are broken, a problem, a failure, behind, or not good at it.

When you embrace who you are, where you have been, and how far you have come already,

moving forward happens with much more ease and speed

.

“Tender self-acceptance,” an integral part of mindfulness is key.

This and self-compassion is the hardest part for most people.

This is where mindful coaching comes in. They take practice AND help.

For many, tender self-acceptance is hidden under layers and layers of old habits of beating yourself up to keep you accomplishing and pushing forward.

It’s hidden under years of habitual striving and seeking external validation as a strategy for evolution and growth.

When we notice.

And pay attention.

Without judgment to what is - accepting it as such-

is when we change in ways that are truly transformative (meaning they are aligned and the changes stick.)

When we stop striving and instead ask ourselves what love and compassion would do is when profound change happens.

When we come from tender self-acceptance is when we can trust ourselves to have our own backs as our journeys unfold.

This is when we can make our decisions and make whatever path we have chosen - the “right” one.

This is also when we can adjust our sails and course correct when needed.