When Your Spouse Is Having a Bad Day

Pause and be present

Pause and breathe.

Pause and notice.

You may notice your tightness, irritation, and/or frustration.

These emotions aren’t going to make your day or your spouse’s day better.

But they do need to be felt.

When we squish them down, it’s like pushing a beach ball underwater.

It’s never better.

All emotions must be accepted and allowed - meaning acknowledged and felt.

You don’t have to like them and feeling them does not mean screaming or having a tantrum.

Feeling them is allowing them to move through your body.

This is where physical practices- hand-to-heart, yoga, breathing, time in nature, or a mindful walk can help.

Then, you can choose to move forward with mindful intention. Perhaps

nonjudgment, non-striving, curiosity, patience, compassion, generosity, accept and….

So many options.

Ask yourself what your future self would wish you had done.

Ask what would love do? what would peace do? what would kindness do?

It takes a lot of practice to answer these questions and show up in a mindful, aligned, and authentic way.

And when you learn how — the “bad days” still happen but you don’t make what’s hard harder. The result — they don’t feel nearly as bad. You might choose not to even use the word “bad” to describe them.