Down Days

I was inspired to share this after a conversation with my dear friend and colleague Dr. Ni-Cheng Liang last week.

I had a down day the day we spoke.

She encouraged me to share my down day.

When we hide our down days- no one benefits.

When we normalize them and support one another, everyone benefits.

So,

Everyone has down days.

They are part of life.

Even part of a mindful life.

Even when you are a coach and are well-coached.

It often has nothing to do with the circumstances of the day.

Down days feel hard.

Like something has gone wrong.

In the midst of them, it feels like something needs to be fixed or made to go away.

Coaching and mindfulness don't “fix” down days or make them go away.

They also don't make it so down days don't happen.

What they help with is helping you experience these days in a more constructive way.

They help you notice them.

Expect them.

And accept and allow all the feelings that come on these days, exactly as they are.

So the down days pass on through with less negative impact.

And you get back to the up days faster.

Down days are part of the tapestry of life.

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The contrast of the down days is needed to help you feel the amazing of up days.

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Accepting and allowing down days is an expression of self-compassion

It is part of owning your humanity.

Sometimes you need to rest and take care of yourself.

If they are all down days, it is an act of compassion to ask for help.

It can also be an act of compassion to ask for help even on the occasional down day.

Being vulnerable and connecting with others helps to smooth out the bumps.

My friend helped.

As did a cup of tea, a cozy blanket, and a walk on the beach.

Noticing the down, sad, heavy feelings and connecting with how they move through you also helps.

Describing them and attending to them.

Allowing them and experiencing them fully.

Realizing that “nothing has gone wrong.”

With a healthy and mindful mindset, the next day usually feels so much better.

Pausing and being present tonight for the sunset.

Part of the spectacular tapestry of life.