Cracks Let the Light In

Two months into this pandemic many relationships, intimate, parenting, or otherwise, are seeing a few more "cracks." A favorite quote of mine: "The cracks are what let the light in."

How can mindfulness help? Accept and Allow. Be Intentional and Notice.

Accept that relationships are often hard.

Accept and allow your partner, child, mom exactly as they are -- strengths, weaknesses, idiosyncrasies and all. Without changing or fixing or even wanting to change or fix them. It doesn't mean you have to like everything they do but why not stop resisting it? Another favorite saying. "When we resist reality we lose 100 percent of the time."

Accept and allow that you are different and will often want different things.

Be Intentional.

Choose the relationship you are in every day. It is a choice. You are not stuck. If you remain in a relationship, you are choosing it. Inaction is as much a choice as action.

Choose how you want to feel. You are responsible for your own happiness and whether you feel loved. Why not choose to feel loved?

"Be the change you want to see." Be loving, generous and kind. Why? Because it feels good.

Notice

Notice how your partner, child, or parent shows they care. Not how you think they should show it but how they actually show it.

Notice how you are the "same" instead of how you are different. How are they "just like you?" Your actions may look different but everyone wants to be heard, accepted, supported, safe, and loved.