Teenagers
I had the most beautiful weekend followed by a frustrating Sunday night.
My teenager didn’t act as I thought he should.
In actuality most of the weekend he didn’t act like I thought he should-- Sunday night was just when it was most apparent.
He acted like a privileged and rude teenager. I don’t think anyone would disagree with me on this. Even he probably won’t in a few days-
I hope at least…
either way he didn’t follow my manual.
I knew in my heart his behavior was coming from something else. As I think about it now “of course” he is frustrated. He has been injured and unable to play his sport for almost 3 months. He is attending a public school that hasn’t yet figured out how to get the kids back to in-person learning yet- not even one day a week. It has been a long pandemic year for him and for the most part he has been a good sport.
After pausing and being present with my frustration, I am able to show up more mindful and curious now.
I wonder if there is something bugging him?
This experience reminded me once again that we are all perfectly imperfect.
He is and I am.
What would love do?
For him and for me?
Love would accept but not like spending the evening with a cranky and belligerent teenager.
Love would accept and allow, and validate my own feelings of frustration. Resisting reality won’t help me or him.
Love would connect with him if I want to feel connected.
Love would handle frustration with grace if I want him to him to do the same.
If I want him to be buoyant in the face of frustration I need to be also.
Breathing deeply and channeling my inner zen and buoyancy. Even on round 3 of parenting a teenager -as a wise pediatrician with mindfulness and coaching tools deeply rooted within — the journey is a journey.
Next week’s Mindful Healers Podcast is a discussion about asking yourself what love would do in challenging relationships and situations. It will be released on Sunday. Hope you will listen.
If you want to work on channeling your inner zen and showing up for your relationships more buoyantly, I invite you to join me for Mindful Love, my small group coaching program focused on relationships. Starts June 7th. Limited spaces available.