A Cup of Love

When we lean into the beauty of the good we have in our relationships, we experience more good. 

There are lots of different models of amazing and worthwhile relationships in this world.

Without a doubt, every relationship is missing something.

When we let go of comparisons with others' relationships, those who we perceive may have more of what we think we want, and we enjoy our own more.  

Dropping comparisons to other people’s relationships is one effective and simple way to improve a neurodiverse and/or struggling relationship.

Could you resist the urge to believe there is a relationship out there that would be better and make you happier?

Could you trust the you who chose this relationship when you chose it?

What if you choose to tell a story about it that feels good and helps you enjoy your life?

If this isn’t possible, get help.

And if with help, you decide you can’t or shouldn’t tell a good story about your relationship, then you likely need to choose something else for your life.

Relationship satisfaction has almost nothing to do with your partner. 

It is almost all about you.

You can choose to feel loved no matter what and you can choose to notice or ask how your partner shows love.

It may not be and often is not how you think they “should” but they nonetheless feel love when they do whatever it is.  Why not see it and enjoy it?

My husband shows love with coffee. 

Meticulously prepared and almost always brought to me.

It is literally a cup of love.

You can choose to invest in your relationships by investing in your outlook and your mind and your stories.   Discover your “cup of love,” notice it, treasure it, and enjoy it.

And if you are having a hard time doing this- there is NO shame in getting help.  Getting help is a sign of strength and love. It is in and of itself a cup of love- for yourself and your partner.